Thursday, November 26, 2015

Mom's Ham and Bacon Carbonara

1/2 lb bacon
1 ham slice
3 T margarine
3 T olive oil
1 lb linguine
2/3 C parmesan cheese
4 eggs, beaten
6 T parsley

Crumble bacon and ham and saute in oil & margarine. Cook spaghetti.
Add HOT spaghetti to rest of ingredients and toss to coat spaghetti with egg & cheese
sprinkle with parsley to finish.

Saturday, April 02, 2011

and the band played on...

Just to be clear, this is not my car. I wasn't driving. This happened to a buddy of mine a few months back. If you're curious this was on 270 near the Easton mall in Columbus Ohio. This event occurred on one of those ridiculously cold December days in 2010. I've titled the post as I have as a tribute to the Titanic sinking. I imagine my friend and his family watching their car sink is very similar to the Titanic survivors watching the boat diuappear into the inky depths... Just like the titanic sinking notice below how the lights have gone out. Now it's going good! Looks like this fire is getting hot. Better get back!

Saturday, April 17, 2010

New Movie Policy

I have had it. Movies take too long. All things in this life have a natural run time. It is wrong for movie makers to feel that they have the right to abuse their audience. Perhaps a new rating system is in order to let studios know just how much pain they cause the movie going public. At the very least I am going to engage in my own policy.

A movie is meant to last 90 minutes. Golf lasts 18 holes. Baseball is 9 innings. Sex takes 14.2 seconds (if you think about baseball or golf, less otherwise). All of these limits have been proven over time. We (as a people) have discovered that the limit to sit quietly in a darkened theater is 90 minutes. Even airlines are now capped by federal law at 180 minutes (3 hours for readers in southern Ohio).

It should be considered abuse for a movie to charge you $10 and then hold you hostage for more than 100 minutes. Especially when the movie is filled with the long, boring, self indulgent scenes of Daniel Day Lewis agonizing over his oil riches or Sean Penn agonizing over the plight of the children in Bagdad. Literally this kind of non-story telling crap can expand 90 minutes of content to two and a half hours. This is abuse!

I would like the MPAA to issue new rating level beyond G, PG, PG-13, R, and X. I propose TDL (Too Damn Long) for any movie with a runtime longer than 100 minutes. The theatres could enforce a ‘use the restroom now’ rule prior to customers entering the theatre. Theatre’s could re-instate intermission at the 60 and or 90 minute mark and force every patron to use the restroom and walk by the concession stand at that time.

Seriously, I will not be held prisoner in a movie theatre by James Cameron, George Lucas, or even (gasp!) Peter Jackson. I have committed no crime. I won’t even watch bootlegged copies of films. Yet these film makers feel compelled to test my bladder limits with every new film. I will not tolerate this abuse of my goodwill, time, and money.

Thursday, April 08, 2010

I got nuthin…

Recently at work we’ve been working through the Seven Defects of Broken People book. Part of our studies is take home assignments. The most recent (and last) assignment is to ‘sharpen the saw’. Since I started this blog to practice writing I have decided to write in this space everyday for one week in order to sharpen my saw. Last night was entry number one for this task and this is entry number two. Here’s the trouble, I’m out of ideas.

I looked at the newspapers for ideas. I read the Seattle Times, the Columbus Dispatch and even the normally reliable Dayton Daily News had nothing that intrigued me. Usually the Dayton paper is rife with stories of hillbillies getting arrested or inner city thugs making poor decisions (“my baby was cold, so I put her in the microwave…”). But nothing caught my eye.

I had hoped after watching the TV news earlier today and they reported that “the police had shot a man with a cleaver” that there would be something. I mean who knew you could shoot a man with a cleaver? I wouldn’t even know how to tell if it were loaded. This has the makings of a seriously good story. Turns out the police shot a man wielding a cleaver. What a disappointment.

Finally I broke down and asked the house dragon. She suggested I write about our recent trip to Nashville and Memphis. She also suggested that I capture the abject fear we both share about possibility of the child moving back home. Neither topic is really bad, but I don’t have my thoughts organized about either, so maybe tomorrow.

Well would you look at that! I have a five paragraph essay about nothing. Paragraph one is the topic. Paragraphs two through four flesh out the idea introduced in paragraph one. Paragraph five is the conclusion. Here we are. I have written a five paragraph essay about not having a topic for a five paragraph essay. I freakin’ rock!

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

The Abortion Misdirection

Why are we making such a big deal out of the abortion rider in the healthcare bill? I think I know.

I believe that abortion is a necessary evil in our society. Liberal politics likes to talk about a right to privacy. Conservatives like to talk about a right to life. Neither position really seems to account for the pragmatic view of our advanced society. Why is this issue a flash point issue for the healthcare debacle?

People still have recreational sex, unprotected sex, and people still have sex who can’t afford a child. I would prefer that people that find themselves with a child because of poor decisions they themselves make and want out, take a look at adoption. But I also think that abortion is a better choice than the dumpster baby option. Abortion is necessary. So be it.

Liberals believe that abortion is the woman’s choice only. In fact, abortions are a badge of honor in certain lower class societies in these United States. Abortions are guaranteed by the federal government (thanks to Roe v Wade) on the basis of a ‘right to privacy’ in the constitution. Conservatives can’t seem to find that passage. So be it.

Conservatives conversely believe that conception is sacred. If a woman gets pregnant the child is instantly accorded personhood status. So evacuating the fetus is murder. This is just a little too black and white even for me. There are unplanned pregnancies, pregnancies as a result of unwanted sex (rape), fetus that are deformed or defective, fetus’ that put the mother’s life at risk. There are real reasons to choose against the unborn and kill it. So be it.

Basically, if you fall on one side of this issue or the other there is no middle ground. There is no compromise where both sides will be appeased. So why are the Democrats pushing so hard to add this hot button to the healthcare bill? Because federally funding abortion by choice sets a precedent for federal involvement in reproduction. Unlike the Chinese who can simply enforce any rules they desire (can you say totalitarian regime?), in the United States we need to turn the temperature up slowly so the frogs don’t jump out of the pot. What the Democrats believe is that we can’t make good decisions without them. Adding abortion to the healthcare bill is the first step to Obama letting us know just how many children we are allowed to have. On the basis of keeping healthcare costs down the government will be able force us to register for children and abort the unregistered offspring. If I were Nancy Pelosi, I would not grant a child license to anyone who voted republican.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Obama-care: A fairy tale

This is a true story. A friend of mine with is a serious runner. He has not been a runner his whole life. In fact as I understand things, he was a big fat bastard until 3 years ago, when he started taking care of himself and running.

Anyway, he is a runner now. He ran the Cincy marathon and is looking forward to the Columbus Marathon coming up in a few weeks. In fact he is looking forward to running a half marathon in Dayton tomorrow morning. Not so fast.

Here’s the main conflict in this story: He started feeling a pain in his calf about a week ago. I suggested he had an injury. Unfortunately I was right. His doctor diagnosed (pre MRI, ultrasound, other tests) that he had a stress injury, fracture, or worst of all a blood clot! Today he was tested for these things, as of noon the doctors had ruled out blood clot (thank goodness) and were looking at the other options.

Every test was expedited. Every option explored. Why? My friend really wants to run. The medical team is working hard and fast to treat my friend. Because it is what he desires. The treatment is by default personalized.

My question is, how would this story play out under Obama-care?

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Time to define lying. Again.

Once again I feel the need to point out that a lie is only a lie, if you believe what you are saying is untrue. So to reiterate:

1) Bush didn’t lie - you can debate WMD's but I think it's pretty clear GWBush thought they were there;
2) I don’t think Obama lied - He apparently changed the language just prior to his speech;
3) I don’t think Joe Wilson was lying - Joe didn't know Obama had just changed the bill;
4) Bill Clinton lied - He knew damn well what the stain on the blue dress was.