Earache My Eye

First of all, my wife is fine. Her car is fixed. She only has residual back pain. Thanks whiplash!

I had some fun playing with the IRS today. It seems that the IRS believes that I owe them taxes from some unclaimed income from 2003. Some company I never heard of, submitted 1099’s and W-2’s to the IRS in my wife’s name for 2003. It was about $1000 worth of income. The IRS, seeing this, believes that I owe them another $300 or so.

So I called the IRS. After wading though a thoroughly confusing IVR system (imagine that…), I finally was allowed to converse with a real human (sort of). Anyway this person read the form to me (thanks!) and then re-iterated that I owed the IRS money. I pointed that I didn’t think I owed them any money. They told me that I was welcome to dispute the charge, but the burden of proving that I didn’t get money from someone I don’t know was upon me. WTF, over!?

How the hell can I prove that? I suppose I could show them my bank statements that don’t have a deposit in the exact amount of the money in question. Better yet, I could get affidavit’s from all the tellers at my bank that I never deposited a check from the company in question as well as subpoena the security camera video’s from all the walk-up and drive-up ATM’s within 300 miles, showing me not depositing a check from the company in question.

Anyway, I did find the company after an exhaustive on-line search and several long distance phone calls. I now know what happened. The company in question wrote a check to us, but then cancelled it before sending it out. But I suppose somehow the actual cancellation of the check wasn’t tracked well enough to not tell the IRS. Whatever.

I of course documented all of this (I still have no real proof) and submitted it back to the IRS as part of my dispute. Also, I submitted an invoice to the IRS for my time resolving their mistake. I have generously allowed them 30 days to remit payment before I would attach penalties and interest. I guess we'll see if turnabout is really fair game.

I guess the bigger question is, does this mean that any sociopath can submit 1099’s to the IRS in anyone’s name and the IRS will assume that the submitted form is correct. I know what I’m doing for Christmas this year. Try not to piss me off.

A Comfortable Silence

Why is it that the some verbose people can be maddeningly terse when the there is real information to be shared? Some people have a gift for being able to talk for hours on end without getting tired or imparting any information. These people feel the need to generate conversation from the moment they see you until the time you depart company. Yet, when the situation arises where brevity is appropriate, these can people absolutely shine.

I have a friend who can yammer incessantly. I mean this person may have read about a ‘comfortable silence’, but they have never experienced one. I mean this person can talk. Of course, I am once again talking about my wife.

When I come home from work, she tells me about her work day. Then she tells me about our child’s day. Then I get to hear any news about the extended family. This critical data can go on for a solid hour or more! All I want to do is change out of my work clothes and use the restroom. I am not allowed to make more than the briefest of comments during these sessions. I might say “Oh?” or perhaps, “Wow!” and the ever popular, “uh-huh”. Then, if I don’t have anywhere to be, my wife will tell me about what she saw on TV that day. All of this is in excruciating detail. If we’re still near each other I’ll start getting repeats of previous day’s conversations. It’s like a ‘Best of’ type of program, as if she’s re-running highlights of earlier diatribes. She just can’t handle her own silence.

To be fair, I don’t really have all that much too say. Witness the silence on this blog. Has it been a month since I last posted? I don’t like to talk about my job when I get home from work. I prefer to “let it age” until the next day. When I get home I just want to vegetate. Truthfully, I suppose I enjoy the chatter. It helps me decompress. It makes me feel needed to some extent. It creates a warm well-lighted place for me. It makes me feel at home.

Yet today, this very morning, when it really matters, I get pithiness! I received the following voice message from my wife as soon as I stepped off the train in downtown ending my commute to work. And I quote, “I have been in an accident. I was hit from behind really hard. ”. What!?!?